Vacation’s all I ever wanted
I knew immediately that I had landed back in California. Standing around the luggage carousel, I watch as nearly everyone put their phone to their ear or talked loudly with their hands-free robotic ear piece safely clipped on. I’m sure every single person on my flight was some super major important person who just couldn’t wait one more second to retrieve all those way super important and urgent messages!
Walking though the terminal on the way to the United desk, I heard a smattering of “right on” and “dude” and “cool” with a sprinkling of “that’s how I roll” and “you know what I’m sayin’?” Aaaaahhhh…California. Home.
With boarding pass in hand to San Diego, I waited at the gate and heard the following conversation between two ultra-hip dudes, sitting right behind me…
Dude 1: Have you ever been to that restaurant Helen Back?
Dude 2: Hell and back? What?
Dude 1: No. Helen Beck. It’s play on words. It’s a pizza place. Do you know it?
Dude 2: Oh, that’s funny. No. Is it good?
Dude 1. That place rocks, dude. It’s like my favorite pizza place.
Dude 2: Really? Sounds cool.
(1 minute pause in the conversation)
Dude 2: So what’s the style?
Dude 1: Of what?
Dude 2: Helen Back. What style is it?
Dude 1: What do you mean what style?
Dude 2: Like, what kind of toppings do they have?
Dude 1: Dude, it’s a pizza place, you can get whatever you want. Their sauce is the bomb.
Dude 2: That’s cool. I’ll have to try it out sometime.
Dude 1: Yeah, you should, it rocks.
Dude 2: Yeah.
Dude 2: Do you know about McGuires?
Dude 1: No, never heard of it.
Dude 2: Oh, it’s the best. But I don’t think they have one in San Diego yet.
Dude 1: Probably why I don’t know it.
Dude 2: Right on. If it was here, you would totally know it dude. It’s really good.
Dude 1: Oh yeah?
Dude 2: Yeah. It’s good to go there when you are like totally starving and stuff cuz you’ll leave full. That’s for sure.
Dude 1: Cool. Sounds awesome.
Dude 2: Man, I love that place.
(pause and then the beginning of a conversation about a co-worker)
Dude 1: I don’t really know him that well, but he seems cool.
Dude 2: Do you know what he does when he’s like, hanging out?
Dude 1: You mean like activities?
Dude 2: Yeah, like what kinds of things does he like to do?
Dude 1: I really don’t know. But he’s cool.
Dude 2: Yeah, he’s cool.
At this point as I was jotting down notes from their mind-blowingly intelligent conversation, I had the urge to turn around and smack the two of them and yell, “You two are exactly the reason I don’t live here! You idiots!” But I imagine that random act of anger would be met with a really profound come back such as…
Dude 1: Wow. That was like totally unnecessary and uncool of you.
Dude 2: Yeah, totally uncool.
Welcome to California! Let the vacation begin!